April Blogging Challenge Day 27 (Something That Is Kicking Your Ass)

Write about something that's kicking your ass right now.

Anxiety is kicking my ass right now. I'm getting 10 to 15 panic attacks a day for weeks now. I've got 3 appointments in a week. I had one (a heart test) and had a strong panic attack the entire time and just wanted to go home and hold my emotional support stuffy! It's bad enough with no panic attack, as they have to press hand on my chest and on my neck. It often triggers a mild Fibromyalgia flair, and did this time as well. It was a living hell for me thanks to my broken brain.

Two more appointments. This is Sunday, I have a dentist appointment on Wednesday and I have had a fear of dentists since I was a child and got a tooth pulled with no freezing in it.

Thursday is blood work just before we go out for coffee. I normally enjoy this, but with a panic attack very possible, it might not be all that fun. Yes, I'm bloody strange, I love watching them take vials of blood out of my arm. Got to remember the left one is the better of the two.

To be honest, this is hashing my calm! This comes in waves like this and can last months. Then all the sudden, I won't get one for two to four weeks. I don't seem to have triggers, they just up and happen (having one right now).

Comments

Post a Comment

Most Popular In Last 30 Days

April Blog Challenge Day 5 (Places You Want to Visit)

Image
List five places you want to visit. 1 Yellowknife , Northwest Territories. It's on the bank of great slave lake. I've fished in that giant lake once, but never been to Yellowknife. You had to fly in at the time. It's very far north. The Dene First Nations are a big part of the city and the industry and tourism in the aria. The stunning beauty of this part of the world is something I only got 3 days to experience in a fishing camp. My entire life I've wanted to travel there and see the city. 2 Cardiff , Wales. It's their capital city and a lot of historic buildings can be seen. It's also where the mythical Torchwood was located and I'd like to visit the location they used as well. There are stunning countryside to see outside the city as well. It is home to some world class dining and amazing pubs to visit. The rich history alone is a draw for me. 3 London , England. The capital city of the UK, home to Buckingham Palace, The Tower of London, and many other hi...
Read more

Two Memories Triggered By Old Photos

Image
Aug 5, 2008 me at 500 lbs. yesterday I was about 349 lbs. (Apr 02, 2025). It's literally amazing that my belly is not hanging down to my knees - it's not even covering my man bits fully. Most people who lose this kind of weight have a bin sagging loaf down to their knees. This photo was just before we found my friend dead in his apartment. I was on the 1st floor and he was on the 3rd. We did not see him for 5 days and went looking because there was a hell of a smell as soon as you opened the fire door. He had been dead for days. They said it was his heart. He was 42 at the time and I was 40. I had know him most of my life and we where close. When I found this photo, I remembered him. I also miss that hat kind of a lot. It was stolen. Jul 3, 2008 this is the Moose Jaw Co-op cafeteria. It's long gone now - instead they rend the space out to a gym. The hardware that was down there as well moved to the Agro center and it was expanded. I took Mom here for coffee every Wednesday ...
Read more

COMMODORE 64 COLOR CODES

Image
Following is the color codes to reproduce the C64 colors in PhotoShop or other similar graphics programs. Now you too can pixel paint just like the old 8 bit days with 16 colors. RGB  0 = $000000 RGB  1 = $FFFFFF RGB  2 = $924A40 RGB  3 = $84C5CC RGB  4 = $9351B6 RGB  5 = $72B14B RGB  6 = $483AAA RGB  7 = $D5DF7C RGB  8 = $675200 RGB  9 = $C33D00 RGB 10 = $C18178 RGB 11 = $606060 RGB 12 = $8A8A8A RGB 13 = $B3EC91 RGB 14 = $867ADE RGB 15 = $B3B3B3
Read more

April Blog Challenge Day 4

Image
Write about someone who inspires you. Not going to name any names, but people who know me might think it's several people, as I tend to know a lot of people who inspire me. This is going to be a bit of a cheat - it's going to be the conglomeration of several people instead of just picking one of them to write about. Not to the letter of the prompt, to to the spirit of it. We will call the person, "Tim." Time worked very hard for a long time in order to help others in need. He never left a loved one or friend go without the help they needed unless he literally could not help for some reason. Time also shared his home with relatives would could not afford to live on their own, even to the point the place became crowded. Time gave his time to food pantries and his church to help with things he was able to do for the community. Unfortunately, Tim could not help everyone that asked for his help, because things have gotten far out of hand in our economy and too many people ...
Read more